To my dearest Matilda x

Dear Matilda,

I can't believe you are now a month old. The last time I wrote you a letter, you were still in my tummy and we were getting close to meeting you. It's been almost a month since I first held you in my arms, the best moment of my life. Since that day, you have already changed from a teeny tiny newborn to a baby who has such a wonderful personality, is growing bigger by the day and loves to be cuddled by her mummy and daddy.

So far motherhood has been both incredibly tough and rewarding-we hate seeing you crying in pain with your colic every evening and wish there was more we could do. Just know it won't last forever and hopefully soon we can have an evening together where you are happy and we can play and have lots of fun! Our mornings together are our special time, you have started to enjoy a bit of tummy time and you cringe when I try to kiss you. I love singing to you and sometimes I think you prefer certain types of music to others. You always seem settled when Mozart is on but One Direction...well, that is a different story! I guess Daddy would say you actually have good taste.

You are changing on a daily basis my Tilly bear. Sometimes I think you look just like me but other days I really see Daddy in you. We have taken you out to a few places already although you probably won't have realised because you always sleep when we are out. We have taken you into town, for lunches at Pizza Express and to the pub to meet friends. Hopefully soon you will be awake when we go out in the afternoon and you can appreciate the wonderful world around you. Right now, it is the peak of Autumn and all around us are beautiful brown, green and orange leaves and conkers falling on the ground. I can't wait to collect conkers with you in a few years time, something I always used to do with my Nanny.

Me and Daddy love you so much and we can't wait to have another month of beautiful Matilda moments. You make our lives complete and every day I feel so blessed and lucky that I have a daughter as amazing as you. Whenever I get a sad moment or I reflect on someone who has let me down, I just have to look at you and know that I never have to feel down or lonely again. 

Here is a little video that you can look back on when you are older...

 

xoxo

18 days x

I can't believe Tilly is almost 3 weeks old. Everyone told me time would fly by when your baby is little and they were so right! I've now been officially a 'full time mummy' on my own for a week now as Michael went back to work on Monday. We miss him so much and this week definitely has been challenging for me, I'm not going to lie! Motherhood...well parenthood is tough work but so extremely rewarding and wonderful. I'm lucky that being with her all day I get to see those small little changes in her. I have had days where I feel very emotional and a little lost but I just have to look at her beautiful face to know that life now has so much meaning for me and she is my world. I started a local new mums group this week and that made a difference to me in that I can meet new people, chat about how the early days are going and feel a little bit more confident in my ability to be a great mummy.

Now Tilly is nearly 3 weeks, she is starting to be a little bit more aware of her surroundings and open her eyes a lot more. She still likes looking at her face in the mirror but I notice she looks at my face a lot more, she seems fascinated by my glasses and hair and I'm wondering whether she is starting to recognise me as her mummy. With Michael, she seems to love staring at his beard! We are loving being a mummy and daddy so much. We still don't have a routine in place, it seems Tilly doesn't like being in the bedroom on her own at the moment whilst we are downstairs. She much prefers sleeping on us or in the moses basket right next to us. She is so little and so soon out of the womb, of course she wants to be close to us at all times. She seems to be trying to roll a little but I think that is probably just her fidgety nature. Her personality is already shining through, I just adore her character. She is the cutest little sleeper but so restless, she has a little stubborn side...I wonder where she gets that from! She loves being cuddled and when we kiss her, she squirms as if to say, 'Leave off Mummy, stop kissing me!!' and it's so cute. Her colic is bad at the moment unfortunately but we are doing all we can to make things more comfortable for her-Daddy truely has the 'over the shoulder' burping technique down!

She is already getting bigger and her tiny baby clothes no longer fit and she is in newborn. Another excuse to buy more clothes for her maybe?! Her fingers are long like her mummy's and her legs and arms are very strong (as evidence shows when we try to change her clothes!) She still finds bath time very traumatic but we are working on making it nicer for her. Last Friday she weighed 6lb 3 ounces and she is getting weighed again on Monday. I wouldn't be surprised if she was about 6lb 7 or so now, she definitely is starting to get a little cute chubbiness.

This week we officially registered Tilly in Kingston registry office as 'Matilda Elizabeth Dorothy Dommett' and it was so wonderful to know that she now has Michael's name. We hope to get married next year but we have decided to make it a small event because the most important thing to us is that we are a family, we don't need anything fancy. I can't wait to be a Dommett too x

xoxo

Week One

Matilda Elizabeth Dorothy Dommett was born on Monday 16th September at 1.16am, weighing 5lbs 7 ounces. Her eyes are blue and her hair is light brown. Her mummy (me) is called Cheryl and her Daddy is called Michael. 

Tilly is everything we imagined and more and I started this blog because I wanted to record all our special moments with her and see how she changes and develops as she gets older. As I write this, Matilda is only 11 days old but she already has her own little personality and adorable mannerisms. I love the way she sleeps with her arms above her head like she is relaxing on the beach. I love her huge windy smiles and looking into her blue eyes when she does open them (which isn't very often right now!).

I think she is beautiful and this first week and a half as parents has been wonderful but very tiring. I have learnt so much about myself and what I am capable of. I have felt such an wide range of emotions and felt like I have been on a bit of a rollercoaster for the past week. Parenthood is so special, I have changed from someone who was quite immature with no responsibilites to a 27 year old mother who has a little girl relying on her 24/7. I always thought that looking after a baby would be easy-you feed them, you wind them, you change them but it really is so much more than that. This little person becomes your world and with the extreme happiness also comes a huge sense of anxiety because you just want them to be ok. When I see Tilly cry and I don't know what is wrong, it's heartbreaking. 

However I have learnt this past week that you can NEVER hold your baby too much. Some people say that you shouldn't because they'll get too used to it but holding your newborn baby close to you is all they need-they have been in your womb for 9 whole months in a warm, safe enviroment. To be left alone in a moses basket must be so lonely. Evening times between 6-12 is when Tilly seems at her most restless. So we have been using my breastfeeding pillow to allow Tilly to sleep right up next to us so that she feels safe. She can smell us, hear us and knows that she isn't alone. And you know what? Since we have been doing this, she has slept and has remained calm when she is normally very grizzly and unhappy. So, that is one lesson learnt this week.

Tilly has already changed in 9 short days and I love to watch her sleeping. She has my smile and I brush her soft cheeks with mine and I feel so happy. She smells so wonderful, I spend ages sniffing her and must look like a complete weirdo. Her eyes are slowing changing colour from a dark blue and seem to already be lighter. She has started to love looking at herself in the mirror (wonder who she gets that from!) and can sometimes follow us with her eyes when we are up close. She likes to wee all over Mummy and Daddy at the worst possible moments but we have perfected the nappy change. Talking of nappy changes, Tilly HATES being exposed. She bawls her eyes out if she is stripped down-a few days ago we gave her her first bath and it was rather traumatic. I hope she gets used to the feeling because I want bath times to be fun for her. She already has her own little personality, she is cheeky and sometimes a bit stubborn-she will do things her way and when she wants to!

She is an angel. Our beautiful angel and this first week has been exhausting (getting used to little sleep is tough) but incredible. I wonder whether I will notice anything new in the coming weeks. Before we know she will be a month old-I want to treasure every day and I wish time could slow down. Being a mother is the best job in the world. x